you know, i hate it when people think they’ve got it worst.
HAH. year 3s, free.
“WE are year ones and year twos not like u seniors year threes who are free without common tests.”
yes honey, some of us don’t have common tests.
but free, honey… FREE?
that’s the worst thing you can ever say.
you’re only into the fucking first 7 weeks of your 3 years.
do you know how it feels having assignments after assignments, projects after projects dumped on you, week after week?
have you ever felt stress so acute you think that “no matter how strong i am, i can’t take this anymore”?
have you ever seen a to-do list filled from top to bottom with assignments and projects you have to complete?
no, you don’t.
have you ever felt the weight of tonnes of projects heaped upon your shoulders, and yet no, that’s not it.
you have the burden of an entire cca, an entire camp to plan, quotations to get, and so on…
all at the same, fucking time.
no, you don’t.
so don’t take the “i’m dying from mugging”, mugging for fucking common tests, and you, being a fucking year three, you have it oh-so-easy attitude with me.
you don’t even have the fucking guts to say that with your name.
why? because deep down inside you know that what you’re saying is unfair – we year 3s don’t have it all that easy, and in saying so, you risk great wrath.
i hate this, you know.
i may be thinking too much, but sometimes… sometimes being the female president in a male-dominated club… it’s fucking difficult.
it may just be the expectations i impose upon myself. but you’ll never understand.
the pressure of having to prove yourself, a mere female, to an entire bunch of oh-so-superior males.
the constant strain of having to show that you’re worthy of their respect.
yes, i know you’re thinking “it’s the 21st century, man! where got such gender discrimination?”
but you know you’re just saying it. you know it exists. it’s everywhere, that is… if you bother to really see.
and it’s difficult. cuz you know you need to bring the club back to the strength it was last time, and it’s tough cuz you know you don’t have as much ability as the seniors have.
and it’ll be tough if you don’t strive hard enough to prove yourself, and get people to cooperate.
so shut up. cuz we all have our struggles, and don’t so easily think less of others’.
be sure your brain, what tiny morsel there is, is engaged, before shooting your fucking mouth off.
it may be an offhand comment.
but you have no idea how much it upsets people, people who are trying their fucking best.
and yet sometimes the best is not enough; it is never enough.
i’m fucking tired.
and i need a good hard cry.
maybe about… now.
